This may sound trivial to some but I have found it really fascinating. Firstly because I noticed it as, only what I can relate it to, a third person looking in. Secondly the more I have sat back and thought about it, the clearer the consistency of what I’ve been doing in two separate, different activities is identical. I haven’t been applying myself to the activity but applying my levels of perception of what is adequate understanding of a subject to them instead.
Let me explain. The first activity is playing the guitar. I only want to be able to play every Oasis song on it. Nothing more. Now after 7 years or so I can only play the intros to each song competently and then there’s a few songs, maybe 10, I can play all the way through. I have had some periods of bipolar depression when I was not able to function never mind play the guitar but even so, that’s not an excuse. If you say 2 years for the time to deal with the bipolar still leaves me 5 years. I don’t know what it is that stops me finishing off my goal. Maybe it’s because the intro of songs is the part people go mad at when they hear it at a gig or wherever?? Maybe if I do it then I have to find something else to focus on? But I’m not focusing too much on this am I? Or should I just relax and let the time come to me when I’m ready to go for it. There’s no rush is there??
The second activity is my ongoing study into the medication used in psychiatry, drug metabolism, guidelines for psychiatric prescriptions, bipolar disorder, my old medicinal chemistry books, lithium and it’s origins. I’m currently looking at the fact where lithium sits on the periodic table by sodium, being in the same category of elements, meaning they share similar behaviours, meaning possibly ‘two’ much salt tastes revolt(ing). In the body sodium is involved in a whole host of biological reactions and I’m researching if lithium could possibly interfere with sodium and alter the equilibrium of the bodies chemical make up. If I said to you that this is one of 14 areas I have started and I’m yet to get a conclusion on reminds me of the Oasis Hypothesis. But then again, searching for conclusions isn’t always a solution. I’m still researching aren’t I? The topics may all be individually unique but they are equally identical as they are all relevant to bipolar disorder.
I don’t know if I’m completely worrying about nothing and I just need to remember what the late, great Alan Watts once said;